01 Dec Energy Suckers

When two or more people meet, a complex energetic exchange takes place. The way one responds to each other’s presence is dictated by both conscious and unconscious conditioning in relation to the stimuli to which one is exposed. This conditioning is determined by numerous factors: genetic information, emotional patterns within the family lineage, personal experiences, and the environment in which one grows up, lives, and works.

This programming is largely unconscious. One is often unaware of how their system has been conditioned over time to deal with various situations. Typically, this awareness arises only when symptoms manifest, by which time several crucial signals may have been missed. Consider stores like IKEA, MediaMarkt, and the “Three Crazy Shopping Days” at Bijenkorf. What do they have in common? By the time one reaches the checkout after hours of shopping, they feel utterly drained. What has happened?

Who one believes themselves to be is broadcast as an energetic transmission from the body. Both positive traits and shadow aspects are perceptible as subtle energetic information. The shadow aspects, in particular, carry a distinct and perceptible charge. The nature of this tension is to seek release, to find an outlet. In this sense, holding tension operates similarly to an inflammation within the body. The system will do everything possible to expel this toxic information. The amount of tension carried is influenced by past experiences and, more importantly, how those experiences were processed at the time. In this sense, everyone carries an invisible backpack filled with unresolved matters.

This backpack is in constant communication with the environment, influencing whom one attracts or avoids. In this way, one unconsciously becomes a co-creator of the reality they inhabit. The quantum field surrounding an individual responds instantly to the information consciously and unconsciously projected into it. During an encounter with another person, this information is exchanged within a fraction of a second. On an energetic level, individuals reveal both their strengths and weaknesses to each other.

To notice this energetic transmission, it is essential to be present in the moment. When there is significant tension within the system, attention is often focused on the past or the future. In such states, it is nearly impossible to discern how one is conditioned to respond to the signals emitted by others. The lack of awareness regarding these limiting conditionings means missing an essential part of the energy exchange process. Often, it is only realised too late when one is already in a reactive state, leaving no choice but to blame the other for one’s feelings. This is why others are often labelled as “energy drainers,” creating the illusion that they are depleting one’s energy.

It is true that people carry tension and seek attention for it, but this is only half of the equation. The other half, often overlooked or ignored, is how one’s body is conditioned to process the information transmitted by others. When encountering someone experiencing fear, for example, the body absorbs and interprets that information. Depending on conditioning, reactions can manifest through feelings, emotions, thoughts, or physical sensations. If fear, judgment, or denial arises in response to these sensations, one energetically rejects the other, keeping both parties trapped in old, limiting patterns. This resistance is the true cause of energy depletion and fatigue, rather than the other person’s negative energy.

This realisation can be confronting but also empowering. By using the body as an intelligent biofeedback system, one becomes aware of their conditioned responses to internal and external stimuli. For instance, when encountering someone who projects fear, one can observe this sensation in the body. Such a reaction reveals how one processes that experience at that moment. Observing the sensation as it is, without filtering or resistance, leads to three remarkable outcomes. Firstly, it discharges stored tension associated with past responses to similar experiences. Secondly, it rewires conditioning on a cellular level, allowing future responses to arise from a place of openness rather than limitation. Previously, experiences were taken personally, analysed, and attempted to be fixed; now, they are observed consciously and allowed to exist fully. The third and perhaps most extraordinary effect is that releasing tension creates space, which is noticed by the environment. This energetic shift allows surrounding tensions to dissipate through one’s presence, literally altering the quantum field.

From this perspective, a trip to IKEA becomes an excellent opportunity to discover areas of resistance to life. Every moment spent with oneself, every person encountered, and every space entered provides a unique chance to observe one’s relationship with the available information. The primary requirement to notice these interactions is to remain present. By asking oneself multiple times a day how they feel and registering bodily sensations, breathing patterns, and thoughts—essentially performing a simple body scan—one establishes a reference point. Being aware of this baseline makes it easier to detect changes in perception.

The only action required with this observation is to experience it consciously and allow it to be fully present. One will soon realise they are fully equipped to engage with experiences without becoming burdened by them. The impact on the so-called “energy drainer”? They may feel acknowledged and cease seeking attention for their drama, or they may find someone else to engage with, which is also perfectly fine. In this way, resistance can be used not only to liberate oneself but also to free the people and spaces around them. Vive la resistance…